Mind the age...GAP

If you have more than one child have you ever thought about the age gap between them? Recently I've found myself being forced to consider my fertility and the idea of adding to my gang. There is five years between my two and actually I'm finding as they get older - now 10 and 5 - life has got a great deal easier. Don't get me wrong I would never label any aspect of parenting 'easy' I think life just evolves, the longer you parent and the more miles you clock up the more tricks and tips you can tuck up your sleeve for every parenting eventuality but it doesn't take much to knock you off course.

Several ladies I know, including my sister, have given birth within the last few weeks. That inevitably gets me thinking about pregnancy. I didn't plan the age gap between my two, I had the eldest then got divorced and had no idea that I'd meet anyone again that I would want to have children with. I met Mr T in 2010 after being on my own for a while. We moved in together in 2011 and our now 5 year old was born in 2012.

The early days of being a mum of two were mixed. I can remember the day we came home from hospital, standing (bearly - thanks to the stitches) in the kitchen with my newborn screaming for food and my almost five year old demanding a drink and a snack totally oblivious to his new brother who was really creating. I stood there and wasn't sure where to turn, who do I see to first? The one that's going mental and will only get louder until I plugged a bottle in his mouth or the five year old who I felt guilt ridden for ignoring while I was in the whirlwind of giving birth and all that entails. That was the moment it hit me. I was going to have to somehow split myself in two.

I've been doing it ever since, always wondering if I have got the balance right particularly as my eldest has additional needs. It has got easier as they got older, especially when now the youngest isn't a toddler and doesn't just trash everything the big one is doing or playing with. We can now enjoy a bedtime story together or perhaps a board game with interesting made up rules, you haven't lived until you have played Monopoly with my two!

We aren't the Waltons by any stretch of the imagination, many a night I have been seriously relieved come bedtime when the bickering and winding each other up has stopped because they are in bed. I love that I have two very individual boys with enough of a gap that they can enjoy and share some of the same interest but also have very separate ideas about what fun in.

Parenting for a decade feels like a landmark in our journey. So far so good. 

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